Send them to the Stocks!!
A selection of those Roundheads whom we would like to put in the stocks for causing we Cavaliers grief, along with the rest of the population, and where they might be pelted with rotten fruit until they repent their sins.
Currently in the Stocks:..
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Herefordshire Council’s Parks, Countryside and Leisure Department
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The (Nameless) Ticket Inspector who turned Rifleman Zachary Holland off his train
The Petty Minded Bureaucrats Who Run Herefordshire Council’s Parks, Countryside and Leisure Department.
Brian Hubbard, a civic minded pensioner in his 70s, has been helping keep his community tidy for 4 years.
He cuts the grass outside his home, weeds, picks up litter, rakes up leaves and cleans up grass cuttings after council contractors have been through.
A pretty good performance, you might think. Public spirited.
Well, you would be wrong.
At least you would if you heed the Council.
They have sent Mr Hubbard a letter accusing him of:
“encroaching” on Council land.
That he must stop tending to the grass and “return the area to its original state within 28 days” or “further action will be taken which may result in the above works being carried out at your expense”.
To her great credit, Heather Davis, a local councillor has taken up the matter, commenting that he should be congratulated for taking pride in his local area not be sent letters like the one he has received.
What on earth do the council expect him to do? Replace the weeds, throw some litter about, generally make the area look as grim as much Council land does throughout the country?
This is just so typical of the autocratic, bureaucratic attitude, which we so despise here. An honest subject does his best to help the local community by tidying up and some petty jobsworth, doubtless on a very good screw and with a fireproof pension, threatens a pensioner in the most unpleasant manner.
These petty bureaucrats hate any private individual showing the slightest initiative, even though it be for the common good and they should be stopped. Now.
We hope any of the good people of Hereford who read this will make their feelings known to their local councillor by using the facility we give you to contact them directly on this site.
In the interim-off to the stocks with them! Let us pelt them with leaf mould, chicken manure and clods of earth until they see the error of their ways.
Jacqui (Jackboots) Smith
We are sending the then Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith (AKA Jacqui Klebb) to the stocks without hesitation for her craven surrender to Brussels by producing an identity card for UK residents that is covered, not in symbols of our own country, but with EU references and symbols. The first cards are to be issued to foreign residents in the UK from November. (We wonder how many illegal immigrants will soon have them, forged or otherwise).
Let alone the arguments that this Government is quite incapable of producing anything involving computers and IT that will work, will not be lost or stolen, will be delivered on time and on budget, what is she doing giving up even more of our sovereignty?
We are not citizens of the EU.
We are subjects of the British Queen. The Laughing Cavaliers are very proud of that distinction and detest the insidious efforts of the socialists that rule in Westminster and Brussels to take this status away from us and call us “Citizens of the EU”, making us sound like some ghastly shirtless mob of ruffians at the storming of the Bastille.
We do not want any further encroachment on that position. In fact, we want to claw back a great deal of what socialist politicians like the useless Ms Smith have already given away to Brussels.
We are against the card in principle any way and we are very pleased to note that that the Conservatives have pledged to scrap the whole rotten enterprise if and when they win power. The Liberals too have opposed the issue of ID cards-to their great credit.
No Jacqui, we don’t want you or your dreadful EU ID card.
Off to the stocks with you, where you may be pelted with ripe camembert, rotten brussel sprouts and aged knackwurst until you repent.
The Crown Prosecution Service - Exeter
The CPS saw fit to back the police in spending £7,000 of taxpayers’ money on bringing a case against Mr Frank McGuigan, 54, who suffers from neurological problems as a result of a cyst on the brain. The case was heard in Exeter.
Police claimed that he raised a finger at two constables through a bus window. They arrested him.
The CPS are quoted as saying that “a price could not be put on justice”. They went on to say that “The public has a right not to expect to see police officers abused in the street”.
Mr McGuigan claims he only pointed his finger and meant no offence. His medical condition also meant that he often rubbed his temples with his fingers.
Well, we beg to disagree with the spokesman for the CPS.
We would say, Sunshine, that “The public has a right not to expect their hard earned taxes to be wasted on frivolous and time wasting stupidities like this”. A brisk warning should have sufficed.
We do not know the full facts of the case but to waste £7,000 of our money on such a minor matter, plus the waste of police time and the undoubted mountain of paperwork that probably kept the policemen concerned away from their jobs on the beat, where we want to see them, is not forgivable. A price can be put on justice when it is as petty as this and it’s about 15p, not £7,000 and rising to possibly £10,000, if there is an appeal against the conditional discharge given. That’s our money, remember, that the CPS are flinging around with such abandon.
We wonder whether the police and the CPS would show the same zeal in pursuing and bringing to justice those various ruffians who are reported by our country members as poaching, stealing quad bikes, red diesel, generators, trailers and heating oil in Devon and elsewhere in rural England recently? If so, we have not heard of it. Somehow, they seem to show a strange reluctance to follow up such cases, it is reported to us by these members. Now, why would that be? Old guys on buses an easier target perhaps?
No! Just won’t do!
Off to the stocks with them!
David Miliband-our laughable substitute for a Foreign Secretary
What on earth gives Miliband Minor the idea that he is so very important that he has seen fit to use The Queen’s Flight at least 16 times in the last year. The Royal Family only clock up an average of 10 flights each a year. HM herself only used the planes 7 times in the last year for which records are available.
Cabinet Office rules clearly state that Ministers should only use these planes when no scheduled service is available.
How is it then that Miliband Minor hopped onto the Queen’s planes to visit places like Berlin and Paris where there are plenty of scheduled flights? Istanbul, Rome, Lisbon and Madrid had plenty of scheduled flights too when we last looked.
The hourly rate for the 4 engined version of the plane he used is £2,432 with the smaller HS125 being a bargain £973. But that does not include fuel. Fuel is extra. Work it out for yourself. Big bucks!
It’s always the same with socialists when they get into power. They hog big at the trough. We daresay that Miliband’s father, a keen Marxist, dandled young Davy on his knee and told the wide eyed child of the special lanes reserved in Moscow for Communist bigwigs, the special stores with luxury goods, the blind eye turned to rule breaking by those in power. Now Davy is getting his turn at the good life in what is rapidly turning into a Socialist republic, with a little help from his friends in the EU.
Just won’t do, Miliband Minor. You’re getting far too big for your Start-Rites.
Off to the Stocks with him!
Andrew Lansley-Tory Health Spokesman.
We despair sometimes of the Conservatives.
Just when we think that they are getting it, just when we think they have stopped wittering on about windmills and melting glaciers, just when we think they understand how we all hate the nanny state, just when we think they really do intend to reduce the size of the hugely bloated state with its over taxation, waste, corruption and stupid rules, then---Bang! They shoot themselves in the foot again.
What is Andrew Lansley thinking about, not only lecturing against fatness but also trying to prescribe all sorts of meddling ways to control the pie scoffers? We thought he had the makings of a sensible politician but he is doing the best to dispel that view. Stop fiddling, Sunshine! Rome’s burning!
For goodness sake, Dave, rein him in before the stoutest amongst us explode with indignation and you loose another potential vote.
Look Andy, most of us, even those of us who may have voted regularly for Labour in the past, are so hacked off with this lot that we can’t wait to have the chance to get rid of them before they drive us all off to somewhere more congenial like North Korea.
So, for the love of Mike, don’t blow it by lecturing us and telling us what is good for us and what is bad. We have had a bellyful of that from Labour over the last 11 years. It is of no concern to Government or you. Your job, mate, is to worry about clean hospitals, reducing hospital infections and cutting out the ghastly waste, over management and political correctness in the hospital service. Just ask the nearest nurse.
There is a simple rule: We are all responsible for our own self-discipline. Tories used to believe in personal freedom so no more lecturing please. We have our own robust response to lecturing by politicians.
Off to the stocks with him where he may be pelted with Melton Mowbray pork pies!
Dr Allison Fraser
Sometimes, dear friends, we have to prick ourselves with the point of a poniard to believe what we are reading.
Gadzooks! But this one is a corker!
Dr Allison Fraser is the Chief Executive of Sandwell Council in the Black Country. An area renowned for the common sense of its people and its dry humour. We have here a particular affection for the people of this area. They are good company and loyal friends.
Some of our friends in that area must be struggling though to find the humour in Dr Fraser’s expenditure of their Council Tax.
Dr Fraser is using your money to attend “A Self-Awareness Course” in Germany and Florida. So, as you can see, poor lady is really roughing it on your behalf.
The course is apparently intended to teach the Dr Fraser to “Become more likeable and able to like herself”.
You know, we have the oddest premonition that she will not immediately make herself more likeable to the good taxpayers of Sandwell by spending their money this way. And so much of it too!
The course is run not, as some of our colleagues have hinted, by leprechauns and water sprites, but by a firm called Avatar.
Avatar claims to teach students to:
“Become more real, authentic”
“To protect themselves against the abrasions of the world”
“To gain a connection with the undefined self.”
The leader of Sandwell Council, one Bill Thomas OBE (Labour) helpfully says that the course represented “good value for money”.
It does, it does, Mr Thomas! For Avatar. Wonderful value.
The course is said to cost a mere £5,000.00 but presumably the poor lady has to get there by plane, she has to have a modest roof under which she may lay her head for her well earned rest and she surely cannot be expected to take a sufficient supply of pork pies in her Dorothy bag to last the whole course.
Our young colleague, Jacob Armitage was heard musing that he would like to “connect with his undefined self and protect himself against the abrasions of the world” in Florida but a quick kick up the rump from Fred Porthos soon changed his mind.
Could we gently suggest to all our friends in Sandwell that they immediately use our contact system to reach their local councillors and congratulate them on this sensible expenditure of their money.
In the meantime we have something else in mind. A short course in reality.
Off to the stocks with her!
Gordon Brown
The Great Ditherer-in Chief has left a huge Brown hole in our finances with his incompetence as Chancellor, compounded by his spell as Prime Minister. (Oh, please let it be brief, Good Lord!).
Shadow Chancellor. George Osborne, to whom we increasingly warm, despite having no party affiliations ourselves on this website, for his good sense in most matters, has done us all a service for pointing out the truly dreadful magnitude of UK debt, presided over by this useless politician, masquerading as a great statesman.
Nothing could be further from the truth. He is no statesman. No “Iron Chancellor” he. More of a “Tin Chancellor” we would have thought. He is an incompetent who, as the true socialist he really is, threw money at every one of his preferred projects-our money, that is-placating his client base, putting nothing aside for the bad times and cynically talking about “Investment” while really meaning “Spend, spend, spend!”, rather in the manner of a crazed lottery winner.
Trouble is it’s not his lottery money that he spent. It’s our hard earned cash.
George Osborne has pointed out that total Government borrowing this year could hit £80 Billion. That is a really staggering figure, particularly if wasted on bribes to the voters.
This would be double the Government’s prediction of £43 Billion, bad enough in itself, but this figure of £80 Billion would be a burden upon us and possibly our children for years to come, so huge is it. His mismanagement is truly appalling and should receive more publicity. Good on George for highlighting the matter.
The trouble is that this reckless borrowing is leading to a “Scorched Earth” policy with the huge debts passed on by Brown limiting the Conservatives’ capacity to cut taxes and do much else either when they take power. If this could be proven to be a deliberate political policy by Brown then it would be wickedness indeed-making the whole country suffer for his own twisted political ends. George should go for him even harder over this.
Gordon Brown has been very fond of patting himself on the back for his supposed achievements in the manner of drunken Glaswegian braggart. He has shouted down any dissent from all those in his own ranks from Tony Blair, through Cabinet colleagues down to any civil servant who dare express a contrary opinion. He is a bully and an incompetent to boot.
We have compared him elsewhere in our Comment section to Benito Mussolini. He has the same strutting self importance, which descends into the comic. Comic he isn’t though. He is a menace to us all. From those who lost their pensions through him, to his senseless sale of our gold reserves at rock bottom prices to the family struggling to pay all the stealth taxes he has heaped upon us to pay for his squandering, spendthrift ways, we should all be demanding his departure. (Pity we cannot impeach him).
Mussolini ended up hanging upside down from a lamp post, shot by Italian partisans.
We would merely like to see this destroyer of our economy being sent somewhere where we can pelt him with the rottenest vegetables we can find before sending him off to a place where his style would be more appreciated. North Korea springs to mind.
Off to the stocks with him!
The representative official of the Maritime and Coastguard Agency (MCA) who forbade the Hope Cove life boat crew from launching to save a drowning girl and then confiscated their boat.
We have given full coverage to this case under our comment number 23, dated 18.8.2008, but we would be deficient if we did not suggest that this gentleman spent a long day in our stocks, having rotten fish and other delicacies hurled at him.
Any official in any organisation who puts procedures and rules before saving lives deserves a specially rotten fish to be hurled at him. (And the odd rather high crab-just to make the point).
Do read the full account of the case as reported elsewhere in our “Comment” section.
The (Nameless) Ticket Inspector who turned Rifleman Zachary Holland off his train
Pity we don’t have his name to shame him but this was the officious twit who turned a young soldier of 19 off his train because he had been unable to collect his Services Railcard.
The soldier was returning on leave after a three day journey back from Iraq, where he had been serving Queen and Country. He was in full desert uniform, including body armour, having been unable to pick up his Civvies from barracks.
This ticket inspector then told him that the discounted ticket he had purchased without difficulty at Chepstow was not valid without his Services Railcard. He further proceeded to demand proof that Rifleman Hoyland, who was in uniform, remember, was eligible for the Armed Forces discount.
A kind fellow passenger donated the extra £50.50 demanded but the inspector added insult to injury, it is reported, by saying” I don’t know what you are complaining about. It’s not as if you’ve taken a bullet or anything”.
Not surprisingly, the soldier swore at the inspector after this cheap jibe. He was turned off the train by this petty official as a result. Doubtless the inspector had a good gloat.
This Ticket Inspector, in our opinion, should be placed in special stocks in some unsettled area of Iraq and the local residents encouraged to hurl whatever they can find in the streets at him. Could be an interesting selection.
We should be treating our returning soldiers with honour, not with this sort of disdain.
There is a case here for a special set of double stocks too.
A spokesman for Cross Country Trains, when challenged on the matter is quoted as saying: “ The company takes allegations of verbal assault on its staff very seriously”.
Put this spokesman in the stocks too for the lily livered, politically correct claptrap that they have delivered.
We take insults to our service personnel very seriously Sunshine and if we had our way you would be pelted with rotten fruit (and anything else that happened to be lying around after the mules have passed by) for your attitude along with the officious inspector.
Off to the stocks with them!
John Prescott
For the sin of forming Regional Development Agencies (RDAs) as part of his plan for Regional Assemblies.
Happily, the English people showed their disdain for his fatuous Assemblies but, like the undead, the RDAs live on. Prescott might have gone from the front bench now but his actions live on to haunt us.
It has now been revealed by the Taxpayers Alliance that RDAs have consumed £15 Billion of your money with the effect that new job creation has actually dropped since they started. Even worse, most of the jobs created are in the public sector, for which you pay yet again. Meddling bureaucrats never do improve business and they tend to confuse bureaucratic pen pushing and box ticking with wealth creating.
39 Quangocrats working for these RDAs earn more than £100,000 PA each of your money. Not only that but doubtless they will receive other benefits like final salary pensions. They certainly get huge allowances apparently, with one agency boss reported to have spent a further £54,000 of your money on taxis and cars in one year.
The idea of letting John Prescott loose with our money to throw away like this while, for instance, the Government preach restraint on pay and refuse to pay the police their independently allotted amount shows the depths of economic incompetence to which our would be masters have sunk.
This is the man, remember, who also inflicted the ghastly and useless bureaucracy of Home Information Packs upon us. As predicted by every expert, apart from those with vested interests, HIPs do not work, they are not wanted, they add to the cost of housing transactions and they slow down the dreadful property market further.
Sir, you have been a catastrophe! A hopeless Roundhead bungler masquerading as a serious politician. You have cost every family in this country money through your ineptitude.
Off to the stocks with him!
Norman Baker MP (Liberal)
For acting as the spokesman for the campaign to do away with the Oath of Allegiance to The Queen.
For 500 years, MPs have sworn such an Oath but Mr Baker seems to have joined the undistinguished ranks of those who would meddle with all our customs. He would perhaps prefer an oath of undying loyalty to The President of the EU, although he has not actually called for this.
He meddles at his peril.
Labour have already, with their ill-thought-out Devolution measures, caused unforeseen problems. Mr Baker will compound them if he has his way.
The idea that, as Mr Baker and his supporters seem to wish, they should swear an oath of allegiance to their constituents and the nation rather than The Queen is criticised with his usual lucidity by Lord Tebbit. He speaks for Cavaliers too. His view is ours.
He is quoted as saying that: “This seems to me to be an attack upon the State itself. The monarch is one embodiment of the State which is outside the political, partisan process.
The people behind this campaign must either oppose the idea of having anyone who is non-partisan having a role in the affairs of state, or they would rather be swearing allegiance to Brussels”.
The Queen has been an exemplary Head of State for her entire reign. She has stood above politics and has been at the very centre of the British Constitution. We could not have asked for a better performance or more dedication to duty.
You propose to swear your new, improved, politically correct Oath to your constituents and the nation. You owe a duty to your constituents anyway, Mr B and you swear your Oath to The Queen as the Head of State. That IS the nation. For goodness sake go back to your crochet and stop trying to pretend to be a serious politician.
Those pygmies who seek to sideline The Queen will need to answer to us if they persist. A challenge to a duel may be imminent, Mr Baker. Our friend, Fred Porthos, is honing his rapier even now. And there are a great number of service personnel who owe their allegiance to the Queen who may have something to say about this crackpot idea.
A very Roundhead point of view, Mr Baker.
Off to the stocks with him!
Tim Yeo (Chairman of Commons Environmental Audit Committee):
For telling us (on the Today programme recently) that we should be penalised even more than the Government proposes for daring to have a large car that does not conform to his “green” requirements for us.
St Tim proposes that, in the interests of encouraging us to make what he terms “greener choices,” there should be a difference of £2,000 between the most and least efficient cars in VED car taxes.
He also insists that older cars, those which the least well off in the community may well run, along with country dwellers and young mothers with families, should also have these taxes levied because, he argues, some 3 out of 4 cars sold are second-hand.
Damn right, Sunshine! That’s all that some of can afford. Old bangers.
It’s alright for him. We understand that he is reported to have claimed some £22,110 in additional cost allowances in the 2006/7 session and we think some £5,226 for car allowances.(If these figures are wrong, we will correct them).
Regrettably, we poor mortals don’t have that luxury. We have to pay for and to run our cars out of taxed income. We don’t get car allowances.
Enough preaching! We pay quite enough tax for our motoring already, when we buy cars and when we run them and fuel them, without people like Tim Yeo preaching at us.
Roundhead behaviour.
Off to the stocks with him!
Alistair Darling:
For the grievous sin of announcing that he might suspend stamp duty on house purchases for a period. (where the Government now take some £6 Billion more from you now in this iniquitous tax than they did in 1977, when it was well below £1 Billion).
But not just yet. No decision until the pre-budget report in October or November.
So why would you buy a house in the interim, Chancellor? Why would you not wait until this measure is brought in (that is if you don’t dither again)?
Is there not someone left within the Treasury with a vestige of a brain who might have coughed discreetly and pointed out that this dithering will cause even more havoc in the housing market, already reeling from the massive downturn.
Did you really intend to destroy the market further, Chancellor. Because that is the effect of your indecision.
Off to the stocks with him!